Golf Scores Offers Clues To North Korean Politics

Lacking any concrete information on what goes in inside secretive North Korea, analysts apparently are reduced to studying the leader’s golf scorecards:

In keeping with his orderly ascension from ranking army general to top political official to supreme leader of the last hard-line Communist country on earth, North Korea’s chubby young Kim Jong-un is expected soon to take up golf, where he will challenge his father’s record of scoring almost a dozen holes-in-one on his first try at the game.

Afforded little else in the way of information on the internal doings of the secretive country, observers will be reduced to parsing news of the young leader’s score, speculating on what it might mean should he fail to match his father’s 38-under-par.

Such is the fantasy scenario of North Korea’s notorious – often ludicrous – propaganda machine, which is operating at full throttle after the death of the country’s last demigod ruler. Observers question whether the regime can maintain the barrage of lies big and little it has used for so long to mislead and repress its citizens.

For those who don’t remember the story, the recently deceased Kim Jong Il was reported to have shot a 38-under-par round of 34, including eleven holes in one. It was his first, and apparently last round. Apparently the game was too easy for the godlike leader for whom the flowers bloomed in the spring, and in whose honor rainbows appeared on his birthday. He also apparently flew fighter jets, wrote operas and directed movies.

Sounds a lot like Buckaroo Banzai.