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Getting the Love You Want: A Guide for Couples, 20th Anniversary Edition | 
enlarge | Creator: Harville Hendrix Publisher: Holt Paperbacks Category: Book
List Price: $15.00 Buy New: $5.98 You Save: $9.02 (60%)
New (41) Used (21) from $5.88
Rating: 125 reviews Sales Rank: 678
Media: Paperback Edition: Revised and Updated Number Of Items: 1 Pages: 320 Shipping Weight (lbs): 0.7 Dimensions (in): 7.8 x 5.2 x 1.3
ISBN: 0805087001 Dewey Decimal Number: 306.7 EAN: 9780805087000 ASIN: 0805087001
Publication Date: December 26, 2007 Availability: Usually ships in 1-2 business days Shipping: Expedited shipping available Shipping: International shipping available Condition: Ships immediately! Perfect and New! Has a publisher remainder mark. Revised and Updated. 2007 Paperback.
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| Editorial Reviews:
Amazon.com Review When Harville Hendrix writes about relationships, he discusses them not just as an educator and a therapist, but as a man who has himself been through a failed marriage. Hendrix felt the sting of his divorce intensely because he believed it signaled not only his failure as a husband but also his failure as a couples counselor. Investigating why his marriage dissolved led him to start looking into the psychology of love. Marriage, he ultimately discovered, is the "practice of becoming passionate friends." As a result of his research, Hendrix created a therapy he calls Imago Relationship Therapy. In it, he combines what he's learned in a number of disciplines, including the behavioral sciences, depth psychology, cognitive therapy, and Gestalt therapy, to name just a few. He expounds upon this approach in Getting the Love You Want: A Guide for Couples. His purpose in writing the book, he says, is "to share with you what I have learned about the psychology of love relationships, and to help you transform your relationship into a lasting source of love and companionship." Divided into three sections, the book covers "The Unconscious Marriage," which details a marriage in which the remaining desires and behavior of childhood interfere with the current relationship; "The Conscious Marriage," which shows a marriage that fulfils those childhood needs in a positive manner; and a 10-week "course in relationship therapy, " which gives detailed exercises for you and your partner to follow in order to learn how to "replace confrontation and criticism ... with a healing process of mutual growth and support." The text is occasionally dry and technical; however, the information provided is valuable, the case studies are interesting, and the exercises are revealing and helpful. By utilizing his program, Hendrix hopes you too will be able to solve your marital difficulties without the expense of a therapist. --Jenny Brown
Product Description
REVISED AND WITH A NEW FOREWORD ARE YOU GETTING THE LOVE YOU WANT? Originally published in 1988, Getting the Love You Want has helped millions of couples attain more loving, supportive, and deeply satisfying relationships. The 20th anniversary edition contains extensive revisions to this groundbreaking book, with a new chapter, new exercises, and a foreword detailing Dr. Hendrix’s updated philosophy for eliminating all negativity from couples’ daily interactions, allowing readers of the 2008 edition to benefit from his ongoing discoveries during his last two decades of work. Harville Hendrix, Ph.D., in partnership with his wife, Helen LaKelly Hunt, PhD., originated Imago Relationship Therapy, a unique healing process for couples, prospective couples, and parents. Together they have more than thirty years’ experience as educators and therapists and their work has been translated into more than 50 languages, with Imago practiced by two thousand therapists worldwide. Harville and Helen have six children and live in New York and New Mexico.
Book Description
In Getting the Love You Want, Dr. Harville Hendrix presents the relationship skills that have already helped hundreds of thousands of couples to replace confrontation and criticism with a healing process of mutual growth and support. This extraordinary practical guide describes the revolutionary technique of Imago Relationship Therapy, which combines a number of disciplines--including the behavioral sciences, depth psychology, cognitive therapy, and Gestalt therapy, among others--to create a program to resolve conflict and renew communication and passion. Getting the Love You Want describes the three stages of intimate relationships, provides illustrative case studies and gives helpful recommendations to overcome the obstacles in those stages to create a stronger bond between couples. First, he chronicles the stages of most relationships-attraction, romantic love and the power struggle-and suggests ways for partners to identify the conflicts associated with each of them. Then, he explores methods for achieving a "Conscious Marriage," where the early phases of romance are rekindled and confrontation is slowly replaced by growth and support. Finally, Dr. Hendrix incorporates these ideas into a unique therapeutic course, offering a series of proven exercises that lead to insight, resolution and revitalization. Step by step, he describes how to communicate with greater accuracy and sensitivity, how to let go of self-defeating behaviors, and how to focus energy on meeting each partners' needs. With Getting the Love You Want couples in any stage of a relationship can resolve their conflicts and achieve mutual emotional satisfaction.
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| Customer Reviews: Read 120 more reviews...
Excellent September 21, 2008 As a psychotherapy training supervisor, I highly recommend this book for singles, couples and those professionals open to a different slant on relationships.
fantastic.... September 14, 2008 Back in the early/mid 90's I was lucky enough to get this book recommended to me. I have shared it with many and continue to do so. I recommend this to anyone!!!! Better yourself, you will inturn better your relationships. Thank you! www.imthankful.com
Not the right book for me. September 1, 2008 2 out of 2 found this review helpful
I did not care for this book at all. In fact, I read about 50 pages from a few chapters and threw the book away. Before you consider buying this book be aware the the author focuses a lot on the subconscious mind and emotional trauma from childhood and how he feels these impact a marriage. The book spends a lot of time helping you understand your subconscious and how your upbringing has screwed you and your marriage up. This may be the right approach for some people but I found it very cumbersome and honestly quite annoying. I guess I'm just not in touch with my inner child. Books I have read and enjoyed much more are Willard Harley's Fall In Love, Stay In Love - Excellent. The best marriage book I've read. I also enjoyed the 5 Love Languages.
UNDERTAND OUR NEEDS August 3, 2008 2 out of 2 found this review helpful
The author gives excellent advice on how each person can grow and learn to fulfill their own needs as well as their spouse's. Even if my marriage does not work out I will take comfort in the fact that my next spouse will get the very best me possible.
It is also an exceptionally easy read and great book about this topic I Love You. Now What?: Falling in Love is a Mystery, Keeping It Isn't.
Helpful help July 16, 2008 This book was right on I reviewed it many time. I gave it four stars because the book was simple and made since. Nothing complicated. The reason it did not make 5 stars is because it only relates to people in a relationship. Not those looking.
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